Great Retirement Quotes

Chairs overlooking beach
Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash

Every once in a while we hear a meaningful or funny retirement quote.  I dug around online and below, and in no particular order, are some I found interesting.

Retirement is a blank sheet of paper. It is a chance to redesign your life into something new and different. Patrick Foley

I can’t wait to retire so I can get up at 6 o’clock in the morning and go drive around really slow and make everybody late for work.” — Unknown

Except for an occasional heart attack I feel as young as I ever did. Robert Benchley

Retirement is like a long vacation in Las Vegas. The goal is to enjoy it the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money.” — Jonathan Clements

Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples. George Burns

“Retirement: It’s nice to get out of the rat race, but you have to learn to get along with less cheese.” –Gene Perret

I always likened retirement to falling off a cliff, and then you have to kind of brush yourself off. Steve Young

Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save. Will Rogers

I need to retire from retirement. Sandra Day O’Connor

You have to put off being young until you can retire. Unknown

If you look at what you have in life, you’ll always have more. If you look at what you don’t have in life, you’ll never have enough. Oprah Winfrey

The real measure of your wealth is how much you’d be worth if you lost all your money. Anonymous

There’s never enough time to do all the nothing you want.” –Bill Waterson

I advise you to go on living solely to enrage those who are paying your annuities. It is the only pleasure I have left. Voltaire

Retirement: When you stop lying about your age and start lying around the house.” –Unknown

Cessation of work is not accompanied by cessation of expenses. Cato

Retirement is not the end of the road. It is the beginning of the open highway. Unknown

Spend your free time the way you like, not the way you think you’re supposed to. Susan Cain

The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does. Author Unknown

Don’t think of retiring from the world until the world will be sorry that you retire. I hate a fellow whom pride or cowardice or laziness drive into a corner, and who does nothing when he is there but sit and growl. Let him come out as I do, and bark. Samuel Johnson

A retired husband is often a wife’s full-time job. Ella Harris

It’s paradoxical that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesn’t appeal to anyone. Andy Rooney

Often when you are at the end of something, you’re at the beginning of something else. Fred Rogers

“I enjoy waking up and not having to go to work. So I do it three or four times a day.” –Gene Perret

There are some who start their retirement long before they stop working.” — Robert Half

“Retirement: World’s longest coffee break.” — Unknown

Need more quotes?  Find lots of inspirational and funny quotes online!

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